Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Yes, as a matter of fact, I could see myself being this mean:

hermgirl's lame-ass excuse to break up:

"I just realized that you're ugly"

'What is your lame-ass excuse to break up?' at QuizGalaxy.com

But they would probably have done something really heinous.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Another really important thing, seriously:

Dick Cheney SHOT SOMEBODY! Ok, can we just investigate him, or something? Just, do it really carefully, seriously.

You simply need this in your life:


Why? Because when he plays Silver Machine by Hawkwind (which he does, like, every time!) it makes me imagine myself in a silver lame outfit wearing a giant cowboy hat and shaking my boo-tay wildly! In fact it's a good thing that I'm in the room by myself when this happens, because I generally hump things violently when I hear that song, so it might be dangerous for anyone caught in the same room with me.

Man, I drank alcohol this week, (something called a Twisted Plisko, a Peruvian drink, I'm told.) I looked at Hentai porn a little while ago (it's all agent139's fault!) I leave the house tomorrow, so it could be quite dangerous for anyone or anything crossing my path.

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Thank the Gods for good vocational school teachers!

So I'm at Regional Occupational Program, taking a class in Computerized Accounting, and my teacher just did a thing where she showed all kinds of websites about doing your taxes and getting academic discounts on software and stuff since we're in school. And I found all kinds of cool places with articles about govt benefits and the board of labor (last year I had to sick the BOL on a rotten employer who refused to pay me what she owed me) and stuff. So I think I'm going to add a lot of these to my daily web reading and get educated.

Here they are in case anyone's interested:






Crossposted like a mofo.

Weird Scenes Inside the Goldmine...

Just some stream of consciousness thoughts.

Bill Clinton's words on Coretta Scott King: Something about how she believed in the promise in the Book of Isaiah, and that maybe we should too...

On the Majority Report on Air America: a study that says Americans are extremely dependent on sleeping pills...

I think, "What has gone wrong with the American Experiment?"

The road to Hermworld lies open, Her towers shining in the distance...


A couple weeks ago, I'm cleaning the kitchen like a bastard. I'm emptying old stuff out of the fridge--I found condiments in there from before 9/11!!!

So, naturally, the father isn't happy with this, and we have a shouting match over it. In the middle of it, he says something to the effect of, "You wouldn't last ten minutes in the Marine Corps. You'd get your ass kicked. Then what would you do?"

I wrinkle my nose at him and smile. "Remember what they said in that movie we watched the other night?" We had watched Animal House. "We have a saying: Don't get mad, get even."

He thinks this is funny, then a little more screaming, then I yell at him to get in the fuckin' front room and watch football. He does.

A little later I go in the front room and he is in his chair looking very small, and he (begrudgingly) says, "Thanks for cleaning the fridge out."


This morning at around 3:20, I was trying to get back to sleep for another hour and a half, and I started thinking about the Loma Prieta Earthquake (which was back in '89.) Well, ok, I was thinking about the guy I was in love with back then, then I started thinking about what I was doing when the earthquake hit: I was writing a poem about God (this was back in the Christian days.) Not a very good poem, more like a song-poem (song-poems are always things you think are great when you're writing them, then you read them later and they kind of suck.)

This song-poem sounded in my head like a snarky Ian Hunter lyric, or maybe a misanthropic, Roger Waters from Pink Floyd "Jesus is great but the rest of humanity sucks!" kind of lyric.

I think when I was a Christian, there was a part of me that wanted to effect a kind of Roger Waters misanthropy, and that little part of me will always be kind of bitter because I didn't achieve it.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

You Might Be a Fatwa Target If...

You might be a fatwa target if:

  • You were spotted hanging out with Salman Rushdie during the Nineties (this list of folks includes Bono, different people are gonna feel different ways about that one.)
  • Despite the advice of the local Mullah, you opt to take in that nice young Christian missionary couple for the weekend...
  • They find that Osama dart board you've been playing with in the rumpus room.
  • Three words: Mohammed mud flaps.

Sunday, February 05, 2006

"Our daughters' daughters will adore us, and they'll sing in grateful chorus..."

I would be remiss if I didn't acknowledge the passing of Betty Friedan, author of the Feminine Mystique, founder of the National Organization for Women:

"Men are not the enemy, but the fellow victims. The real enemy is women's denigration of themselves."

When she stopped conforming to the conventional picture of femininity she finally began to enjoy being a woman."

" The feminine mystique has succeeded in burying millions of American women alive. "

Also on the list of great gals when the role is called up yonder: Coretta Scott King, who married a handsome young theologian...

And lastly, who can forget Granpa Al from the Munsters, who said: "
Herman! Herman, please! How many times do I have to tell you not to pound stakes while I'm around? You know it gives me heartburn!"

Friday, February 03, 2006

Friday Night Tarot Hoedown

Tarot In the News: From Vineland, New Jersey--Invasion suspect is collared. It seems there is no end to the connection between Tarot and shady characters, I wonder why?

Practices: Scientific Illuminism, or Something! Well, I've adapted this daily practice to Tarot, rather than gaming dice, utilizing only the Ace through Tens of the Minor Arcana. One of the tools I've used for interpreting the results is "Godwin's Cabalistic Encyclopedia". Been doing this for about a month now, and I've gotta say, I feel like I'm getting cabalistically in tune with my cards. I also recommend getting comfortable with your one to ten cards--it seems that much emphasis is placed on the Majors and the court cards, when the pips are certainly as important tarotistically, and also the numbers one to ten extremely important if you're getting to know the qabalah. I think I owe someone a quarter.

Podcasting: Through the Gate into Tarot is the name of a guided imagery, nlp sort of meditational hypnosis podcast, done by a guy named Brian David Phillips, a hypnosis expert, with several different "hypnocasts" that seem worth looking into.

I have done the meditation and will share my results and impressions with you now, note that this is not a divinatory interpretation, but more of a free-flowing, meditational experience.

The idea is to draw three cards that form the basis for your meditational imagery:

  1. The Mentor card--a guide to the experience. I drew the Eight of Swords.
  2. The Context or Grounding card. I drew the Wheel of Fortune.
  3. The Catalyst card--what puts the Mentor and Context in motion. I drew the Three of Cups.
I saw the Mentor as a sort of Jacob Marley figure--the imagery of the 8 of swords really going along with this, with the figure swathed in some kind of winding sheet-looking tape.

I turned over the Wheel of Fortune. Expect the unexpected! Ok.

The Catalyst card was rightfully named, because I truly didn't feel this meditation experience really taking off til I turned it over to discover the ladies of the Three of Cups dancing away. I noticed that in the Rider Waite Smith deck, the woman in the 8 of swords seems to be wearing the same frock as one of the women in the 3 of cups--surely this is no accident!

As I allowed the two cards to frame the Context of the Wheel, I saw in my minds eye a party like that of the 3 of cups, one of the centerpieces of which was a large Maypole, with people dancing, creating a giant wheel in the middle of the festivities, and had a feeling of the turning earth and the changing seasons that a Maypole signifies.

There were also other, smaller wheels at this party. I saw a table, with folks in lovely RenWear standing around drinking and talking, watching a roulette wheel spin. I even heard Tina Turner shouting, "Bust a deal, face the Wheel!" I saw one of those kind of wheels.

Throughout, I was reminded of my Guide and my Catalyst. The eight of swords woman was there in a corner, silently conveying (it is hard for me to imagine her as speaking) that the power to overcome any bondage is within us, and that our participation in the "Party" of Life is what determines our Fortune.