The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Tarot Mages

I hope everyone was good to their mom this weekend.

My sis and I took Mom to a nice restaurant in Half Moon Bay, right next to the beach. It was nice seeing my niece, who is a little punk rocker with her pink and black checked vans (oh, the memories that brings back!)

Then yesterday, I met with my friend Cerulean from the Aeclectic Tarot message board, and we had the first meeting of the San Mateo County Tarot Association, which at this point, and maybe for the first few meetings, consists of just us, and maybe a couple of others, that didn't show yesterday.

We had coffee at Kepler's, and discussed all manner of things. We then did a reading on the future of the group, which I am going to post my interpretation of, both here and on the AT board sometime at the end of the week, because it was one of those big spreads that I really have to chew over.

She also again very generously gifted me with a new tarot deck, the Tarot of the Secret Garden, which I will post a review of sometime soon.

We then went to Feldman's Books, a nice used bookstore near Kepler's, where I purchased The New Tarot for the Aquarian Age, a deck from the sixties. Look for a post on that one soon as well.

Slamdancing With the Angels, or, "At my left hand, Uriel..."

"Zeus speaks: Drink my friends, drink with the gods of Olympus and become one with them. Be one of us and part of all that has been in this beautiful land. I will make you all gods and goddesses, with powers and realms of your own. I ask only that you acknowledge me as ruler of Olympus and all who belong to it. (He holds out the cup and waits.)"
--D.A. Nowicki, The Shining Paths

The week before last, I was offered a similar cup to drink from. I can't quite name it exactly at this juncture, but I've been invited to do something.

I have been hoping for this opportunity for a while and been preparing for it, but naturally now that it's here I am beset with niggling doubts.

Do I take the red pill or the blue pill?

After living under that question for the past week, Sunday night I'm doing my nocturnal thing in my room, listening to one of those college radio stations. The kind that plays the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, b/w Screaming Jay Hawkins, b/w Diamondia Galas, b/w Anton LaVey doing torch songs with an organ, b/w some kinda ambient stuff that sounds like breaking glass and people screaming mixed together.

So, I got very confrontational with my Spirit Guide.

My eyes fell on my Doreen Virtue Healing With the Angels and Archangel Oracle cards (I was ridin' the razor's edge the other night, buddies!) and I said, "OK, baby, let's dance! You TELL me what I should do!"

I threw the big cards on the bed, mixing them violently. This was how the draw fell:

1. Trust
2. You Know What to Do--Archangel Uriel: Trust your inner knowlege, and act upon it without delay.
3. Forgiveness
4. Relationship Harmony--Archangel Raguel: We angels are opening the hearts of eveyone involved. Arguments and conflicts are being resolved now.
5. Abundance

Just as I laid these cards out and was looking at them, the radio show hostess came on. Her voice was deep, throaty, and suitably gothy. Her name (I am not making this up!) was Ophelia Necro.

She was saying something about getting mentally prepared: "For some of you, this will mean going to sleep. For others...You know what to do!"

Astrology Quiz

Your Rising Sign is Pisces Dreaming and introspective, you're often lost in your thoughts. Which is okay by you... you're inner world is pretty darn awesome. And while you are inwardly confident, sometimes you seem a bit unsure. People often handle you more delicately than they need to. You love luxury, and even if you're a bit broke, you want things to look "rich." Mysterious and demure, you keep secrets about yourself to remain an enigma.

What is Your Rising Sign?

This is so true, especially the part about how I'm inwardly confident, and people often handle me more delicately than they need to. Plus this factor is exacerbated by how I look so much younger than I really am.

Recent Bookstore and BATS Aquisitions

• Lon Milo DuQuette--The Book of Ordinary Oracles (Very cute, and indeed quite useful, and I got a very nice autograph!)
• Hello Tarot (What happens when you mix Sanrio and Tarot?)
• Gerald Suster--The Legacy of the Beast (This one, and the next three, gotten at Green
  Apple Books in San Francisco)
• Aleister Crowley--The Heart of the Master
• DuQuette--Angels, Demons, and Gods of the New Millennium
• Franz Bardon--Initiation into Hermetics (only fifteen bucks--SCORE!)
• Laura Scott & Mary kay Linge--Divining the Future (I found this at the Book Market after I went to BATS--apparently, I hadn't spent my last available dollar yet.)

So, that gives me something to do, in addition to the philosophy homework I have to get back to...

Adventures in the Tarot Brigade

Lately I have been attending Tarot classes taught by the weird and wonderful Thalassa, where I made many new friends.

An interesting highlight from the last class was an exercise she called the "Carnack" exercise, in which we acted like the Johnny Carson psychic character, putting a card up to our forehead with eyes closed and talking about the impressions we got. Actually, this seems like a pretty good thing to do, to help open the psychic center of one's brain--I think I will do this once a week.

What really baked my noodle about this was that the guy sitting next to me in class immediately named his card and the colors and emotions evoked by the card. Woo, scary. This is a guy you definitely want reading for you because he's got mad skills.

Anyhoo, on completion of that, it was on to the great celebration of all things divinatory, SFBATS!!!

And of course, I got to hobnob with the hoy and the polloy, first and foremost being the lovely and talented (and one of my favorite people) Lon Milo Duquette, who introduced me to one of the guys working on the upcoming Crowley film and I found out there was no room in the budget to have Jude Law in the starring role (crestfallen though I was about this, at least that means that the Johnny Depp money is also out of reach. Johnny Depp would just be wrong, I think.)

Other highlights included Rachel Pollack, the Joseph Campbell of Tarot, who told a wonderful fairy tale, and then expounded on the commonalities between Tarot and fairy tales. I asked her what she thought about current pop culture and things like comic books and movies like the Matrix having more metaphysical content--I didn't know at the time that she had actually done some comic book art--I read about it later and felt like an idiot.

Then I was having a good discussion with a lady for about a half hour when she revealed that she was Valerie Sim, author of Tarot Outside the Box and creator of the Comparative Tarot.

On the whole, I had a tremendous time, meeting famous authors and getting to talk to them, and totally acting like a book groupie. I made printouts of a couple of my spreads and passed them out liberally to my friends.

I can't wait for the next one. I feel like these are my people--I like them so much and want them to like me too--kind of a dorky thing to say, but that's how I feel.

Five of Cups--I think this means I needn't feel like such a dork up against these Tarot biggies. If I look around me I will see my own potential and the resources that are there for me to be a great writer someday. I must not overlook my inheritance.

And with that, I must go do homework. My sadistic philosophy prof has me reading about something called "hard determinism" which I do not like very much at all.<|P

Train Home

So the other night I went to my Tarot class up in Berkely, and on the train home I saw something interesting.

Getting on the train just ahead of me were these two girls who had the same kind of hair, it was cropped short and very light blonde. They had the same style sense about them, but they weren't dressed exactly alike.

They were like a personification of Gemini, exept they were Sagittarius and Pisces(I asked them--I know, I'm weird that way.)

The Piscean had a scarf on, just like the one I was wearing that night (and I know this is a very bad pic, but it was a ten-dollar digicam.) exept hers was varigated white and green--very nice, but not homemade like mine.

I just thought it was an interesting bit of synchronicity.

You scored as Spanish. You should learn Spanish. It can be useful especially if you live in the United States. Spanish 67% Latin 53% Arabic 40% French 40% Chinese 33% English 27% Japanese 13% What language should you learn? created with QuizFarm.com

Actually, I might do that next, after Philosophy. I once took a course kind of half-assedly, and now I know how to use el banyo when I need the WC, and I got to where I could communicate a little with people I worked at McDonald's with. Un poquito Espanol, es muey bueno! I must pick it up again.

So, anyhoo, I've been busy studying my philosophy, which is why I haven't posted in a while. I just took a midterm, which I just barely scraped through with a decent grade, I think.

In other news, I've been going to a Tarot class up in Berkeley, tomorrow night is the final one. Also, I will once again be attending the wonderful SFBATS, so I'm a happy camper about that.

At this juncture I have nothing else to report. I have a full day ahead of me tomorrow in the City, so I best be hittin' the hay.

Just felt like checking in.

No wonder he wanted to kill his father and fuck his mother...

http://www.ifilm.com/ifilmdetail/2665896?htv=12

I am Hermit, Hear Me Roar!

LiveJournal Haiku!
Your name:	hermgirl
Your haiku:	a little faith in yourself the hermit--you have the capacity
Username:
Created by Grahame

So I've been thinking about all the crap I have to get done these days--look at this list:

• Housework


• Philosophy homework


• Learning Tarot/magick


• Reading and getting rid of books


• Working on website and blogging


• Getting a part-time job


• Saving $$$


• Walking the dogs at a decent hour


• Doing craft projects--knitting, crocheting, learning new stitches, etc.
  

Amazing, says I. Thankfully, someone dropped this cool link (thanks, Sunfell!) and I followed the links and the upshot is that I've decided to start on David Allen's program. I know, yet another book to read--I'm one of those people that's always trying to finish eight books at the same time.

On that front, I'm about a third of the way through the Parsons bio, and this evening I was thinking about how a crater on the dark side of the moon is named after him. If I'm not careful, I may find myself becoming enamored with Jack Parsons. Something about a hot nerdy scientist, I dunno.

So I had that on my mind and pulled this card: The Moon. As I meditated on what it might have to say to me, I started thinking that it doesn't always mean self-deception, but imagination, and I started thinking of myself as that lobster, or another creature, rising out of that pond, and following that path between the towers, into the dark unknown.

I started thinking about other things like the Hundred Acre Wood, and the woods outside Hogwarts, where Harry Potter confronts Valdemort one evening when he's out wandering around.

I checked Waite's Pictorial Key, and it has this to say about the Moon:

The path between the towers is the issue into the unknown. The dog and wolf are the fears of the natural mind in the presence of that place of exit, where there is only reflected light to guide it.

The last reference is a key to another form of symbolism. The intellectual light is a reflection and beyond it is the unknown mystery which it cannot shew forth. It illuminates our animal nature, types of which are represented below--the dog, the wolf, and that which comes up out of the deeps, the nameless and hideous tendency which is lower than the savage beast. It strives to attain manifestation, symbolized by crawling from the abyss of water to the land, but as a rule it sinks back whence it came. The face of the mind directs a calm gaze upon the unrest below; the dew of thought falls; the message is: Peace, be still; and it may be that there shall come a calm upon the animal nature, while the abyss beneath shall cease from giving up a form.

Morty, I wave my granny pants in salute to you!

Just surfing around the net and came upon this piece of awesomeness. You should go there. It is an amazing site with lots of good stuff like forums, links and streaming video. You should check it out, if only for the clips of James Inman, and the ever wonderful RAWilson.

Also, today I was at Barnes & Noble, puttering around and having coffee, when I happened upon a new bio of Jack Parsons.

Strange Angel--by George Pendle, ISBN # 015100997X

Seems to be a little bit better written than John Carter's Sex and Rockets, going deeper into his childhood and literary interests, such as early sci-fi pulp mag "Amazing Stories", as well as the temper of the times he was living in. Indeed, Pendle even does a good job of making rocket science romantic and mystical (as it certainly must have been to Parsons.)

On this perusal, Strange Angel seems like a good read, with lots of background info and references to support the story. I am left with the feeling that I definitely want more than a quick skim of this book at the B & N coffee shop.

For those of you who don't know who Jack W. Parsons was, he was a rocket scientist at Pasadena's Jet Propulsion Labratory in the 40s and early 50s, when he died in a mysterious accidental explosion in his home.

He was also a Thelemite who wrote a book (which I have yet to read, unfortunately) entitled Freedom is a Two Edged Sword. He turned his home into an early hippie commune, that was much talked about in the press.

He hobb-knobbed with the sci-fi intelligentsia, authors such as Robert Heinlein, Ray Bradbury, Jack Williamson, and A.E. Van Vogt. It was his association with Elrond Hubbard, himself a pulp
fiction author at the time and the creator of Dianetics, that led to some interesting misadventures. That is all I'll tell you. Go google it, you won't be sorry.

Various & Sundry Things

Well, I was kind of depressed earlier this week, but I think I'm OK now. Part of it having to do with what a damn mess my room is, and having no $$$--which is nobody's fault but mine (spot the Zeppelin lyrics.)

Also, my parent's separation (which I'm sure is permanent, not that I thought it wasn't) is starting to wear on my dad. He has been bitching and moaning about how Mom doesn't love him, etc. He looks at this as Mom doing something to him. He doesn't seem to think about the fact that he didn't really act very lovingly towards her, or ever take notice of the many warnings she gave him.

I love my dad, and we get along most of the time (I could also say the same of my mom), but he really drives me nuts sometimes. He is 70, and it is like he is going senile. He talks incessantly, and he is constantly calling me into the living room when I am busy to look at something on tv, or to push food on me. He is so invasive sometimes I just want to scream, "Jesus, do you EVER shut up?" I find myself wishing he would just die, already, so Mom could come home and we could fix the house up the way she wants it.

The other day My Gay Neighbor came over and had to have me use my key to get into her place, despite the fact that someone (her cousin) was already in the house and could have just answered the door. She introduced me to him gushingly, saying, "She's cool! She can read
your Tarot cards for you!" she ended by stroking my hair with a flourish. OK.

I will be doing a Tarot reading here tomorrow, but I'm afraid the Tarot Hoedown will be going on a sabbatical, due to philosophy homework.

Regarding the philosophy textbook, I am noticing it is about as subtle as a heart attack--"How extensively have you examined the beliefs that have come to define who you are and how you live your daily life?...Are you, say, a Xian who believes in one God, because that is how you were
raised but had you been raised in India, you would have been a Hindu, believing in many Gods?"--and using the existence of God and the issue of abortion in examples explaining what syllogisms and disjunctive statements are!

I can just see some of the soccer moms and yuppie chicks who bring babies to class(there were a couple that I saw) dropping away. I know at least one of them will loudly declaim (either to the enire class, or they will seek me out--because I'm sure they will see me as one who really cares what they think) how much this material is challenging to their beliefs. Some will see this as good, and may find it refreshing for their mundane muggle brain, and others will simply cave in at the thought of actually contemplating what motivates their lives.

I am around the same age as many of these women (and the class is almost all women) and I can visualize them being the same kind of kids who picked on me in school. My only crime against them: being someone who preferred reading and thinking for myself, rather than following the herd in a mindless attempt to be popular and wear the right clothes, have the right hairstyle, etc.

Now that they are old and tapped out, after pounding out who knows how many babies, they are going to attempt logical and independent thought?

I salute those who actually succeed in freeing their minds. The rest, I will be laughing at you on the inside.

Sunday Night (or Monday Morning) Tarot Hoedown

First, (since I don't have much to offer this week,) I thought I'd share some Tarot links that I think are really good. With the exeption of Aeclectic, these are ones that don't usually get the
airtime they deserve.

Aeclectic Tarot

Church of Tarot

Supertarot

Tarot Corner

Tarot Traditions

Tarot Passages

Tainted Tarot


Next, as promised, I will demonstrate the use of the Soul Questions spread. I did the reading for this on Friday night, when (as usual--you guys know me) I was up waaaay too late since I had to be up and ready to go somewhere at 7:30. You will note that the cards seem to take me out to the woodshed.

While a sound drubbing might make for an interesting evening in some quarters and at appropriate times, you've heard me say it before: sometimes the cards just kick my ass.

Consider this an object lesson: When you get a reading that is not quite a happy affair, you may not want to discount what the cards are telling you out of hand. After all, this is your subconscious speaking to you, saying things you might want to say to yourself if you had yourself sitting in a chair right in front of you.

1. King of Pents, reversed--Danger, Will Robinson! Your faculties are dulled and open to corruption.


2. Four of Cups--Possiblities are there, but you need to get out of your own way first.


3. Moon--Your overactive imagination is working against you, kid.


4. Nine of Swords--You are wallowing in the mire of
   despondency--once again, get out of your own way and have a little
   faith in yourself.


5. The Hermit--You have the capacity to share the secrets you have with others.


6. King of Swords, reversed--Don't be selfish and cruel--you could be setting yourself up for a fall.
   

This is basically saying, "Listen, silly, I'm not gonna give you a reading when you are up so late when you have to get up early the next day!"

I am abandoning my purpose by staying up late. I wasn't feeling right about doing the reading. I was decieving myself and so not utilizing my talents well. I was very unhappy about not having enough time, just need faith in my abilities.

One bright spot about this reading was it told me I could utilize this to share my foibles with others, and thereby pass on a little knowledge that way.

It tells me that my staying up late is a manifestation of bad selfishness.

So Thursday was the first meeting of the Intro to Philosophy class.

I know there are some of you out there that go to REAL college, and I envy you. There are some reasons why many people laugh about community colleges, and they were exemplified by some of the people in my class.

First I was in the bookstore, picking up my textbook, and some woman came up to me, the way many women before have come to me, in various vocational school classes and similar venues, they come to me wanting something, and having the feeling that I am someone with the ability,
if not the inclination, to help them out.

Of course it was a very small thing, no skin off my nose to answer the question, but it was what she did after that really frosted my ass. Again, what she DID wasn't huge either, but still...

She noticed that I was getting a text for the same class as her, and asked me what room the class was in. She knew where the building was, just not the room, she said. Thinking she might walk with me to the building, and thus save me having to check the map, I told her. I turned around to sign for my stuff, and when I turned back, she was gone. Like it would have killed her to wait another 10 seconds for someone who had helped her out.

"That's the last time I help her!" I thought. I have had a snootfull of what these kind of women do in schools. These goofy housewife type bitches will come wheedling and simpering and whimpering for you to help them with their papers with no regard for the fact you are busy working on yours. These kind of bitches really screwed my sister over when she was going to Notre Dame. I'm not that generous and will ignore anyone who doesn't take no for an answer (I've had to do so before, obviously I may have to again.)

No thanks to her, I found the building, got there a little early, and found about eighty percent of the class sitting in the dark. That's right folks, none of these future ontological pontificators had
the presence of mind to flip on the lightswitch. I did so, decrying, "Let there be light!" And there was light.

Tuesday Morning Tarot Hoedown

Hello, fellow babies out there in the blogosphere, this entry is brought to you by the beverages: Red Bull and Coke. When you absolutely, postitively, have to get something done. The
Hoedown will return to Friday this week at it's regularly scheduled time.

The first item of business will be a review.

Divinatory Suite Software

I've tried other Tarot software and been slightly disappointed, but this gets a big thumbs up from me! Not that it's entirely without an iffy side--my Spybot Search & Destroy ping-ed
a few times while it was downloading, and if I didn't have Firefox I don't know what shape my browser would be in now, so this is probably not for people without good protection. That said, however, the features are worth the "price of admission"--which is "free to download and use forever!" which makes my cheap side very happy.



First you have access to three different decks and the standard Runes, 21 different Tarot spreads (including three different versions of the Celtic Cross.) You can manage the particulars of the spread: do you want to use only major arcana? Do you want to use card reversals?

The choices given make for a much more usable interface, and though I still had to get my own cards out and go over the reading like I always do with a computerized reading, I didn't feel as "removed" from the spread as I would have if I was using that Tarot software I paid ten bucks for at CompUSA.

But wait, there's more! There is also a diary function, where you can not only store the reading, but post your own thoughts. There is also a section where you can learn card meanings. But the feature that really sold me was the "Create a Spread" function. Here you are given space to
create layouts, and a place to type in the meanings of every postition. Also, you are given the option to share it with the Divinatory Suite community.

All in all, this gets the Hermgirl Seal of Approval.

And now, without further ado, I give you the latest spread I have developed, and a reading on myself to demonstrate its use.

~ The Soul Questions Spread ~

This is probably a good spread for beginners to use, since it has less than seven card positions (as always in my spreads, you can add an extra card on a position to elucidate.) It is quite heady, though, so be sure you want answers to these questions. Also, you will probably only want to do this spread occasionally, say once a month or so.

Just lay your cards out right to left.

1. Your basic purpose in life--your True Will.


2. What makes you unique?


3. Where does your genius lie? Skills and Talents.


4. Life challenges (and how to overcome them.)


5. What you should know about current changes.


6. Life developments: What will manifest for you if you continue on the path you are going down?
   

Since it has gotten very late, I will continue with the reading demo tomorrow.

I wrote this last night but couldn't post it because my comp was going floopy on me.

Writing this in my notebook as the Bart train careens towards Berkeley...

I had two eggs for breakfast this morning, fried in olive oil.
They were perfect, and when I plated them out, I noticed that the way
they had cooked rendered them into a natural Yin-Yang symbol.

I am getting back into the swing of things. You know how when you
are really sick for a couple of weeks, you'll get well, but you are
slightly off your game for another couple of weeks? That's the
way it works for me, anyway.

So I took this morning's breakfast as a sign. Getting back into
the swing of things, I'm a member of the First Church of Hermworld with
Fire and Signs Following.

More after my Pathworking class.

Resumed today, due to last night's technical difficulties.

Last night we traveled from Yesod to Hod.

Hod can be thought of as the Realm of Nerds. The guided
meditation took us to the Library of Alexandria (and as a book nerd,
the Library of Alexandria is a place I've often thought I would see
when I got to heaven) and references made to Socrates, Jesus, and Da
Vinci, among others.

In the Tarot, Hod corresponds to the four eights in the deck. Here is what Crowley has to say, in The Book of Thoth:

"Being in the same plane as the Sevens on the Tree of Life, but on the other side, the same inherent defects as are found in the Sevens will apply.

Yet one may perhaps urge this alleviation, that the Eights come as (in a sense) a remedy for the error of the Sevens (the Sevens having been described as pertaining to Venus, and to Earth, which weakens the energy of Venus.)

The mischief has been done; and there is now a reaction against it. On may, therefore, expect to find that, while there is no possibility of perfection in the cards of this number, thery are free
from such essential and original errors as in the Lower case."

In the year 2005 I resolve to: Teach my dogs to fly. Get your resolution here

There are five of them, so I better get crackin'.

Happy New Year, Blogger Citizens!

Statements of Will for 2005

Rather than make "New Year's Resolutions", which are something you can make, then forget about by February, perhaps if I do it this way, I'll be more likely to keep them (it could happen!)

In 2005, I will:

• Stir more meat into the pot. I'm talking essay-entries here in this journal, as well as articles and a new look for my website.


• Become a raging health-machine. At any point I should be able to stop and ask myself, "At what percentage am I being the Ultimate Health Machine?" Getting hit with the flu over Xmas is my motivation here, while it afforded me the ability to opt out of a holiday I am rapidly growing disenchanted with, it's no fun having Twilight Zone hallucinations and thinking you're gonna die...


• Keep a magickal diary. There is a very convincing argument here for the benefits of doing it.


• Explore the depths of what I can do with my with my new digital camera. And no, sorry, that doesn't mean what some of you think that need to get your minds outta the gutter...

The Pathworking Class

Well, this was definitely worth the trip up to Berkeley. I am almost having a hard time writing this because of how much I have swirling in my head today.

This was a class held at the lovely Ancient Ways Bookstore. When I told them "I'm here for the Pathworking class," they said, "Congratulations!"

There weren't a lot of us, but everyone seemed like nice people. Without much ado, we got into it. Thankfully, I had come when they were just starting the series. There was an explanation of what pathworking was, and then a discussion of what path would be being worked.

In this case it was Malkuth to Yesod. Crowley's Book of Thoth was read from regarding the correspondences to this path. It was from the chapter, "The Small Cards", the section on the four tens and nines--snippets of which I quote here:

The Four Tens: "These cards are attributed to Malkuth. Here is the end of all energy; it is away from the 'formative world' altogether, where things are elastic. There is now no planetary attribution to consider. So far as the Sephirah is concerned, it is right down in the world of Assiah. By the mere fact of having devised four elements, the current has derogated from the original perfection. The Tens are a warning; see whither it leads--to take the first wrong step!"

The Four Nines: "These cards are attributed to Yesod. After the double excursion into misfortune, the current returns to the middle pillar. This Sephirah is the seat of the great crystallization of Energy. But it takes place very far down the Tree, at the apex of the third decending triangle, and a flat triangle at that. There is little help from low, unbalanced spheres like Netzach and Hod. What saves Yesod is the direct ray from Tiphareth; this Sephirah is in the direct line of succession. Each of these cards gives the full impact of the elemental force, but in its most material sense; that is, of the idea of the force, for Yesod is still in Yetzirah, the formative world. Zoroaster says: 'The number Nine is sacred, and attains to the summit of perfection.' Egypt, and Rome, also, had Nine Major Deities."

Then we were led on a guided visualization based on the Persephone myth, taken from the book, "The Shining Path", by Dolores Ashcroft-Nowicki. We started in the Temple of Malkuth and worked our way into the Underworld. There, we got to actually meet Persephone (who was quite beautiful.) At the end of it, I felt like our little band had been on a Hobbit adventure (with me playing the part of Gimli the Dwarf.)

After the pathworking visualization and dicussion was over, a separate thing happened. A woman did a reading from "The Vision and the Voice", which, as she explained, was a series of visions that resulted from magickal workings done by Aleister Crowley. Although the imagery was beautiful, this particular piece of AC's work is going to require a lot more study from me before I understand it.

At the end of the evening, there was much discussion and explanation by some of the more well-versed in the group, which I and another novice were quite thankful for.

So today, in the afterglow, I was feeling much more grounded than usual. I found myself taking more notice of what was going on around me: these kids getting off of school, that guy driving the truck, those houses going by as I rode on the bus--all are part of everything floating in the Malkuthian "soup".

"...and i will like to end my SEARCHING..."

I got this at Friendster today--the spelling has not been changed!

"with a greate pleasure and excitement it gives me

to write u this note of mine, well am graduate in
international relation,am from nigeria and dont
mind, having u as my friend out there if u dont
mind .................
and it took ..........me time to read everything
that u
wrote inside ur page,so i went through it and it
s
lovely wise saying compare to what i like
dont mind and am 36 yrs old.......... I really love
ur
smile out there and
ur shape as well (uh, I posted a pic of Belle from Beauty & the Beast!) well,lady i will like u to holla me and tell me
what
u think about been ur friend down there
concening with what i read from ur page......i
love
evryrthing u wrote inseide, really goes
the
way i like and i will like to end my SEARCHING
if u
dont mind.
further,i work at the stock brokers, company so
am
the assitance to the MD.
so lady u as well as send me some off line
msg
through my chating wchich is (name withheld to protect the innocent) u can
send me an off line msg so lady i will like to say
some thing that well make me happy
so bye 4 now and stay cool
(Name withheld to protect the innocent)

In other news: I will be attending a pathworking class tonight--will take notes and post her

My Goat Worshipping Love Cultist name is Sister Chupacabra!.
Take The Goat Worshipping Love Cultist Name Generator today!
Created with Rum and Monkey's Name Generator Generator.

Sister Chupacabra!

Sister Chupacabra! It must be said with an exclamation!

This reminds me of a really old movie with Ringo Starr in it where he was like a member of the Mexican Mafia or something, and there were these Mexican dominatrix women and I can't remember the name of the movie for the life of me but it was one of those weird movies that they used to show on USA network's "Night Flight" which was on during a really weird/stupid period of my life where I used to stay up all night on the weekends watching the weirdest tv shows I could find and actually smoking oregano and taking eight exedrin in a pathetic attempt to get high...

You think you've blown out all those particular brain cells and then your memory bank serves up something like this.

Card of the day: Queen of Cups--Sister Chupacabra! is a woman of tremendous intuition, capable of great depths of emotion and love. My minions, you will bow down and worship Sister Chupacabra! (Eyes aflame with Anna Magnani-esque passion.)

Grab the nearest book.
Open the book to page 23.
Find the fifth sentence.
Post the text of the sentence in your journal...
...along with these instructions.

"She started screaming at the bridge where Uncle David's house was, and immediately Uncle David's wife, Lena, came out onto the bridge and answered in kind."

Sidney Poitier--This Life

Saturday Night Tarot Hoedown

Well, I'm a day late, (and LJ was in read-only mode for a while, so it's even later than that,) but I have some good stuff for you tonight, buddies.

We start with a new feature. It may not appear every week, but I will be combing the internet for good news stories featuring Tarot.

Tarot in the News: Tonight's top story reminds me of years ago when I was a very young Hermgirl. I had a best friend at the time (a now ex best friend) who had run up a tab with a fortune teller. I was asked (and being the naive, trusting, generous young'un that I was, I complied) to take my last 27 bucks out of the bank to help cover the debt.

This story also makes me think that if I ever do become a professional Tarot reader, I will never allow "tab running". I think that getting psychic readings is one of the kind of things people can be really spendthrift about--it would be unethical, I think, to contribute to someone's spending problem.

And, in keeping with the past week's political theme, I have come up with a new spread!

~The Political Spread~

This spread is good for situations in which you need to map out a strategy, either against an opponent, or if you are making some kind of deal with another person or group of people.

The numbers represent card positions, the positions marked with an X are just there for spacing purposes.

7
3 1 8 2 4
5 6

1. Your advantages


2. Their advantages


3. Your disadvantages


4. Their disadvantages


5. Foundation of the situation


6. Consensus of all concerned


7. Spiritual/psychological energy surrounding the situation


8. What you need to drive home for the "win"

I actually don't have that kind of a situation in my life this week, so I will just be doing a Joey Tribiani spread on myself:

1. Seven of Cups--There are several possibilities before me. I must remain focused to choose wisely.


2. Seven of Wands--Success and victory are mine for the taking! If I take courage and am determined, I will hold my own agaist any difficulties.


3. Knight of Pentacles--Slow and steady wins the race. Not a lot going on here, but my patient nature lets me plod on methodically into good things.


4. Queen of Wands--This stands for the charming, firey natured, passionate, woman of action that I want to be. If I follow the trail of the last three cards, this is what I am likely to become.

What do the cards have to say this evening?

Card of the Day: Six of Pentacles--Business success, prosperity. Life is being generous to you.

I think this may have to do with the fact that I found a digital camera for a lot less money than I was originally going to pay. In other words, Sunfell, the Goddess Bargaina has smiled upon me.

Long and preachy, but oh well...

By the original poster's own admission, he was feeling full of vitriol this morning, and is a little more resigned now, but I felt his words were very appropriate, echoing the level of anger many of us are feeling, and I got permission to quote him here:

"So, congratulations, people of America. Now we know that gay people are so fucking terrifying that a misdirected preemptive war that engendered more terrorist activity than it eliminated, a president who makes jokes about missing WMDs while American soldiers and Iraqi civilians die, an attack on our civil liberties, and trillions in defecit are just dandy. Just so long as two men don't fall in love. Fucking rot."

And this is one of the saddest things of all. It means that guys like Pat Robertson did a damn fine job of promoting prejudice.

We seem to live in a country of lemmings. The majority of people rely on the media and celebrities for everything they do, from the way they wear their clothes, hair, and makeup, to the books they read (Oprah's book club, anyone?), to the candidates they support.

And while all of this is incredibly sad (I found myself having a good cry today) it does not mean we should give up the fight, or spew hatred at the USA and say you're going to leave the country and that everyone who still chooses to call themselves an American is stupid (I had to unfriend someone who was spewing extremely hateful junk like this today.)

Certainly, anger is the mood of the day, and we should all feel justified in letting off steam. Having said that, sometimes things don't go our way, even if we do get off our butts and work hard to try to change things for the better.

And when that happens, that's not the time to roll up into a fetal position, and say "Screw you guys, I'm goin' home!" like Cartman on South Park. That's the time you are supposed to dig in your heels, and commit yourself to continue working.

Nothing worthwhile ever comes easy.

Card of the day: Two of Wands--this is someone who has reached maturity. Someone who has the stick-to-it-iveness to push their dreams through into reality. Someone willing to look at the Big Picture. I believe today, of all days, is a day we are being asked by the Universe to be Two of Wands people.

As my spiritual guru, Aleister Crowley, says in The Book of Lies:

"Hunger thou, O man, for the infinite: be insatiable even for the finite; thus at The End shalt thou devour the finite, and become the infinite.
Be thou more greedy than the shark, more full of yearning than the wind among the pines.
The weary pilgrim struggles on; the satiated pilgrim stops.
The road winds uphill: all law, all nature must be overcome.
Do this by virtue of THAT in thyself before which law and nature are but shadows."

Return of the Daily Card

Just sitting here listening to Air America on the Quake, thought this would be a good time to do a card of the day:

Judgement--Definitely in line with the idea of news being waited for, renewal, and a time of seeing the Big Picture, and one's role in the scheme of things.

Sorry, I don't think I can get the projected results for Ohio with the cards...

Happy Halloween

Well, happy Halloween everybody. I was surfing around and came across something very apropos. A special spread for today, and a demo in interpreting it, by way of doing a reading on myself.

~The Halloween Spread~

Well, as they say, tonight is the night when the veil between the worlds is at its thinnest. And it seems as though the spirits have definitely had their say here.

1. Two of Wands--what I see here is that I am a person with a lot of dreams and plans--I am a woman with a vision. Now, how this becomes tricking others is I sometimes spend too long in dreamland. Of course, the ultimate trick (wouldn't this be a surprise to my folks) is that I actually have the power to make those dreams a reality.


2. The Hierophant--I am definitely a spiritual animal. This being my soul card, it has a lot of significance. I believe in what I would call an "Inner Teacher." This is what I think of when I get this card. I believe that the spiritual learning I have done so far and will continue to do gives me a certain amount of authority to feel confident about what I know. How this can become tricking myself is when I sometimes am stubborn, set in my ways, and behave like a Dubya who can't admit when they're wrong.


3. The Devil--The way I can treat others better is by examining my motivations. Am I being selfish and greedy? Of course, I sort of like being selfish and greedy, but, oh well.


4. Seven of Wands--This makes me want to break out into that old church chorus--"Be bold, be strong, for the Lord thy God is with thee..." Anyway, I can best serve myself by being bold and courageous and suffering the slings and arrows because by doing so I will push through to the place I really want to be in life.


5. The Magician--Last night or the night before I was watching the Matrix again on tv, I've decided that this film is one of my favorites in recent history. What this card reminds me of here is that moment where they are watching Neo fight with Agent Smith on the monitors and one guy says, "What's he doing?" and I think it's Morpheus that says, "He's starting to believe." This card represents that moment when you have to accept the mantle of your Powerful Imagination. Choose to rely on your intuition, your skills, be confident in the power of your Will. Know that anything is possible, for this world that we walk around in is nothing but the construct of the human mind.

So I will end by paraphrasing Neo:

"My name isn't Mr. Anderson...it's HERMGIRL!"

IO PAN!!!

This entry was written yesterday, but it was so late, that I decided to wait til today to type it up.

After Curves yesterday I was getting a chicken sandwich at Jack in the Box, and I bumped into someone--someone I had been thinking about out of the blue last week, and I don't think I had even thought about him in years!

It was a guy I knew in fifth grade. He was almost nondescript, I could have easily not recognized him. I have met up again with a couple of people from back then, I almost never recognize them - but they always seem to recognize me. If I hadn't been thinking about him earlier last week, I probably wouldn't have thought to start looking at him.

Then we were both looking at each other from across the room. I moved up in line and I was near him.

"Is your name Martin?"
"Is your name Hermgirl?" (not really, but you know what I mean.)

I smiled and looked up at him, and asked him a question I had asked almost 30 years ago.

"Would you be interested in going steady?"

He laughed at this. Who knows what direction his life would have taken if he hadn't been impervious to my feminine wiles?

Anyways, this was an interesting bit of synchronicity. I had found a penny while I was walking one of the dogs yesterday, I always expect something interesting when that happens.

The Saturday Night Tarot Hoedown

(Not the kind of hoedown done by Ashley Simpson.)

Tonight I am curious about two things: My future as a Tarot reader, and my future in web design, so I will do a three card draw on each.

Drawing on my relationship with the Tarot:

King of Swords, Queen of Pentacles reversed, Strength.

I posess the intellectual ability to be very authoritative on the subject, although my downfall is materialism--the tendency to focus on things like collecting shiny new decks and books. The best path to take, my True Will in the situation, is to realize that this is part of the Great Work of self-transformation, and that it is best served by using the Tarot to go within to find my strength.

Drawing on my future in Web Design: the Lovers, Six of Pentacles reversed, Page of Cups reversed.

It is a great Gemini kind of communication device, but just like anything the Gemini gets their mitts on, it can be a bih time-waster. I don't have quite as much knowledge about it as I'd like to. And this last piece of interpretation I am deducting from the way the cards fell: Whenever you have, as I do here, a three card draw with two in a row either reversed or upright, this can tell you that "You will know more about the situation in the future."

So basically, (the Lovers) a good fun thing for a Gemini, (6 of Pentacles reversed) don't let it become a time-waster, (Page of Cups, reversed) you don't have too much knowledge about it yet, (2 reversed on right side) give it some time, you'll know more.

Shameless plug and bid for the opinion of all and sundry:

So here is a link to my Tarot page on my website: link. This is something I've been working on over the past week. I am no HTML expert, by any means, but I did do the code for that (admittedly simple) table myself.

I was wondering, if anyone would care to comment: I was told by someone that a shade of purple I was using on the left side made the text unreadable, so I went a skosh lighter here. Does anyone else find this unreadable?

I am planning to nest a table of one column in the green side as a menu of articles--which I have one of almost ready to go, and plans for another one in the near future, so there will be two there for a while, and it will grow from there.

Even as rudimentary as it looks, I feel extremely proud of this--I would enjoy others opinions on it.

SFBATS in my Belfry...

Hermworld Industries regrets not producing a Friday Night Tarot Hoedown this past week, as we wanted to make sure we got to bed early enough to be sure to get to the San Francisco Bay Area Tarot Symposium on time. The Hoedown will return this week.

I arrived on time on a rainy, windy, morning, the dreariness of the weather a counterpoint to all the fun that was about to be had. I noticed the people attending the event were a mix of ages and dress styles, and while being mostly women, there were quite a few men mixed in.

Pretty much the first thing I did when I got ther was get my shopping nailed down at all the vendors, so as to have plenty of time for schmoozing. They handed out lots of freebies, and what was purchased was gotten a good deal on, so the bank was not broken. Lady Nuit's admonishments were gladly heeded, as we do all things unto Her, and greatly is the Queen of the Night Sky to be praised.

The decks and books I got were these:

• The Visconti-Sforza deck (won at a raffle)


• Dorothy Simpson Krause's Millennium Tarot (a generous gift)


• J. Philip Thomas' Tarot de Paris (classically beautiful)


• Liber T (sort of a "Thoth clone" with strange "sci-fi" sort of pictures on the pips)


• The Universal Tarot (A Waite clone)


• Tarot and Astrology by Muriel Bruce Hasbrouck


• Llewellyn's 2005 Tarot Reader (which I got autographed by Mary K. Greer and Thalassa)


• The Book of Formation, or Sephir Yetzirah, translated by Knut Stenring


• Tarot and the Magus, by Paul Hughes-Barlow


• New Dimensions for the Cube of Space, by David Allen Hulse (which I got at a Bookmarket I saw on the way back to BART)
  

I was then greeted by Joseph Earnest Martin, creator of the Quest Tarot (and apparently, in some circles known of as "Lord of the Margarita Salt Flats", whatever that means.<%P) I schmoozed with him, Thalassa, and some other symposium goers, and then was happy to connect with a friend.

Then it was time for the speakers. Joseph Martin kicked off the conference, speaking on "Tarot Taboo--Breaking Tradition with the Cards" and of course, almost the first words out of his mouth were about love: "The more you feel love and compassion and having fun, the better!" This is a guy who oozes love and warmth from every pore. Anytime you mention compassion, my ears prick up, for some reason I really love that word.

His talk revolved around breaking out of the box of tradition that some have attached to the Tarot, which he illustrated with some acts of "scientific" prestidigitation, as well as donning an apparatus that had digitized text that moved from right to left (sort of like those messages on buildings in NYC)that said, "Everybody loves a Psychic BOY!!!"

Then Mary K Greer gave a talk. Being a person who loves fabric--I worked for three years in a fabric store--I couldn't help but admire the beautiful orange and green chiffon dress she wore. She spoke on the theme running through the Minor Arcana of the Rider Waite Smith deck, which, as she explained, were based upon the grail legends.

Her in-depth research of the complete works of A.E. Waite was evident as she waxed eloquent, punctuating her scholarly discourse with mystical wisdom, giving me to understand that Waite was not as stodgy and unspiritual as I had previously come to believe.

Then it was lunchtime, and I hung out with my friend. She very generously presented me with a Tarot deck. I'm going to have to think of a way of reciprocating.

Anywho, we barely had enough time to grab some fries at Mel's Diner and rush back to the Unitarian Church. Where it was time for a slide show given by
Holly Voley, who presented "A Field Guide to the Rider Waite Smith Tarot Deck." This was a deck collector's dream, showing the many different editions of the Waite deck. This could have given Stuart R. Kaplan a run for his money.

Then my friend and I helped J.P. Thomas set up a labyrinth in one of the rooms for a presentation called "Tarota" in which the querent is shuffled and the cards are drawn from a bucket. I walked the labyrinth and found it quite interesting. For helping, he gave me a beautiful art print which I later discovered was "Alchemy" a Tarot de Paris card that corresponds to Temperance.

Thalassa, the Mistress of Ceremonies, gave a talk entitled "Tarot: All Terrain Vehicle of the Soul" in which we learned that it's a metaphysical floor wax AND dessert topping! In her weird and wonderful way, she talked about how Tarot figured in the timeline of history, and about how the Universe is always communicating with us, and the Tarot is a great tool to help us listen.

Then the proceedings were almost over, but not before Thalassa re-emerged garbed in purple--purple wig, purple robe, etc. There was much hurling of Mardi Gras beads, and a raffle, a special bat dance, some more schmoozing, and then it was over. There were a lot more speakers and presenters, but many were running concurrently in different rooms, so I only got to comment on the ones I saw.

Much fun was had, some things were learned and discussed, goodies were gotten, friendships cemented, and my relationship with the Tarot as a tool was revivified. I really enjoyed being with this group of people.

And what better antidote for a boring Monday...

...than a little verse from Uncle Al

INSIDE INFORMATION

I am assured that every man is God
Because the simplest-minded, dullest youth
Witless and ignorant, a stock, a clod,
Has perfect understanding of Pure Truth.

Innate, exact, identical with mine,
Though all in vain Philosophy has sweated
That simplest concept even to define
Humanity is certainly indebted.

To intellect for divers useful arts;
But when it comes to any serious odds,
Our brains play second fiddle to our hearts--
Damned lucky that we happen to be Gods!

Friday (Middle of the)Night Tarot Hoedown

Due to the stress of the past week, I had to put a moratorium on the daily card reading, it will be returning next week.

I am going to the SFBATS festival. Will take copious notes and review the event for you all.

Tonights offering, in fact, comes from the Daughters of Divination website--an organization I am really thinking of joining because they seem to have a lot of cool Tarot events planned. That seems to be the only way I will have of meeting any local Tarot people and getting more practice face to face.

I have despaired of the Tarot Meetup group in my area--it seems that 5 people joined and promptly forgot their membership. At one point, to drum up local interest, a couple of years ago I even started a yahoo group which I advertised on Craig's List, once again to no avail. There were 3 active members, we had one meeting in a local library, which basically consisted of me giving one member a reading, and the other member not being able to find us as she searched the library. Meanwhile, we got thrown out of the library for talking. About eight months ago, after no activity on the yahoo group, on the Meetup message board, someone claimed that MY yahoo group was THEIRS--the hubris! So of course, I shut it down.

Anyway, to the reading:

~The Psychic Polaroid Spread~

1. Wheel of Fortune, reversed: Well, things have been topsy-turvy lately. We've had a little bad luck.
   


2. Page of Swords: My ability to just observe and take things in is coming in handy. Since this is Swords it kind of reminds me of the Watchers on the Highlander--"...to observe and record, but never interfere..."
   


3. The Chariot: An interesting callback to the wheel theme. I am going to forge ahead, rolling on my big wheels with a fire in my belly, taking what I've learned and running with it.
   


4. Six of Pentacles: Interestingly, I had done a spread before this one in which this came up, but it was reversed, as were most of the cards in the draw, didn't like it, so I scrapped it and did another. I can be a very generous person, and sometimes a little spendthrift, I think this is a warning not to go overboard with the $$$.
   


5. Three of Cups: Might these young ladies be dancing in a wheel? Much rejoicing, happiness and fulfilment. Don't forget to have fun!
   


6. Four of Wands: This one also showed up in the prior spread--I had thoroughly shuffled, so this is a message that things will be ok. There will be peace in the valley, by and by.
   

Summary: So there's been misfortune, if I keep my head about me while others are losing theirs, etc. Things may be swirling around me, but if I keep dancin' and don't be afraid to step out and take the driver's seat in my life, there will be harmony. And don't spend too much money on books at that festival, young lady!

"Our master, the Devil, prospers the revel..."

It's Crowleymass!!!

And in honor of the Great Beast, Aleister Crowley, 666, the closest thing I have to a spiritual guru, I offer the link to one of his most beautiful poems.

Not for the faint of heart or people of narrow sensiblities...

So, this morning, I got up at seven am, not grudgingly, without even being asked, so that I could help my mom move some stuff to her new apartment. I guess I half expected to be patted on the head and told what a good daughter I was (It's kind of a mistake to expect a good guy badge for certain things), and she did seem happy that I was there.

But later on my sister got there and was also helping, and after that the three of us went to lunch, and my mom made a point of telling me I was very smelly. I'm sorry, but I had just spent all morning lifting heavy boxes, having mom be sharp with me here and there throughout the day, if I sweated a little, I'm sorry. My sister gets there, does about half of what I did, and my mom is sweet and deferential towards her. Not that I expect her to kiss my ass, but I don't think she realizes how mean and nasty she is to me. After we got home she was even more cutting and insulting.

Part of this I know is just the whole tension of the experience of having to leave, and me having tension about her leaving. I want this to be over so we can all move on with our lives. In a weird way, she is acting as though she is going to continue to have control over everything in our house (granted, STILL half her house even though she is moving) from her apartment 8 miles away.

Her attitude towards me is as cold and denigrative sometimes as it is towards my dad, who is on the hook for things he did and said before I was even born. I feel like she looks at us both as complete slobs who will just bury ourselves in our own shit without her stabilizing influence.

I also think that four months or so down the line (she had mentioned something today about being on a six month lease, so how permanent her residency is questionable), she will come to my dad and say "If you clean things up, I will come home." But part of the reason he's not throwing a hissycow over this is because she's done this before, and she spent 3 months in an apartment, and according to him, she was running out of money and begged him to come home (it may not have gone down exactly like this.) He will have been looking at the fact that this is a $1000+ a month drain on the finances, even if it is her money that she worked for, and he may not see her coming home this time as the glittering prize for being a good boy. Not that he's pure as the driven snow.

Basically, I am just venting steam here, because having said all of these things, I really love them both and we get along well most of the time. I am just sort of caught in the middle, wanting to keep things smoothed over so that there is as little drama over this as possible. I've been trying to reinforce the positives of the situation to each of them, I guess because when they get frustrated with things, they tend to take their anger out on me.

One of the interesting things about my mom, my sister and me is how we can be at each other's throats one minute, and a few minutes later be picking apart the faults and pecadillos of some other (not present) family member. The saving grace of our family is we sort of all have the ability to communicate, even though they all make me feel like pulling my hair out at times.

Card of the Day: The Empress. The waters from behind the High Priestess flow freely behind her. There is a wisdom here that is higher than my wisdom. The mystery of the Great Mother, of the All-Nurturing Energy, is something I need to lay hold of. I think of Sigourney Weaver in the first Alien movie, talking to the ship's computer(which was named Mother), saying "Mother, you BITCH!!!" But the ship's computer doesn't reply, it just keeps counting off. One must continue to learn, even in the face of conflict. The character of Ripley goes on to become the strong mother figure, protecting and defending the innocent ones she loves. The mother ship destroyed, it is as if she takes it into herself, suceeding in its mission--to persevere and survive, even as she rebels against its own self destruction. It is that alchemical communion of dividing and uniting that seems to allow the transformation to take place.

Early Saturday Morning Tarot Hoedown

In this episode, I have a special offering for you, a spread I made up.

The Joey Tribiani "How you doin'?" Spread

It consists of four cards, put 'em side by side, or in a square if you want, it matters not (but if you just put them in a row, you could add a card or two underneath each position to clarify the issue!)

Imagine these questions in a Joey Tribiani/Vinnie Barbarino voice--this is a very important part because it adds to the fun:

1. What's goin' on? What's been going on in the past.


2. Wheah you at? Where you are today.


3. WhatCHOO lookin' at? The issues you are facing.


4. Wheah you goin'? Probable outcome on the road you are traveling down--this is a changable thing, not a locked in destiny.

And my cards in this spread: 10 of Cups, 2 of Pentacles, Queen of Pentacles, and 8 of Swords.

What I see here is that in the past there has been famial harmony, which is going to be transforming into something else. Where I am is that I am going to be learning an intricate balancing act of discipline--I am going to be keeping things together. What I am facing--once again my mom's issue is at the forefront and she is there in all her Capricornian glory. Probable outcome: I may find myself a little fearful about breaching the tension in the houshold in the coming weeks, but I will overcome by being bold.

The Pentacles represent the issue of me becoming more resposible materially--to be honest, I have relied on my mom for a lot, and this is going to be me learning to take care of things for myself a lot. Discipline, discipline, discipline...

Card of the Day: Ace of Swords

Behold Excalibur!!! I AM the rightful King of England!

But seriously, this signifies that in this time of family transition, I am going to find that sword in the stone. My intuition, intelligence, and wherewithal are going to be coming to the fore in this experience. I am being given an opportunity to learn about my greatness (!!! I know) and my True Will.

My mom came home from work today with a bunch of moving boxes. She is leaving Dad and me this week, going to live in her own apartment. She had hinted around that she might do this but I didn't think it would be so soon.

She has been very unhappy living here, in many ways our house is not a very good place to live. You see, my dad is a very bad pack-rat.

Our kitchen is practically unusable--only one person can be cooking or doing anything like that at one time, and forget about having guests over, because the kitchen table is buried underneath stuff. We can't go into the garage anymore to wash clothes, we have to have dad go out there and do it for us.

Our back yard is better than it has been, but that is only because a couple of years ago some neighbors called the city and the city got on my dad's ass.

So I don't blame my mom one bit. And I love my parents very much, and in many ways we get along very well together, but they definitely have their problems. When my mom told me I just said well, I just want you to be happy no matter what you do.

Having said all of this, I also feel like a heavy weight is being lifted off my shoulders. You see, my mom has often taken her anger at my dad out on me. She is a controlling Capricorn, he is a Gemini, like me, (this is a BAD romantic combination, folks!) and I don't think they've gone a day of my life without having at least a minor argument.

I talked to my dad about it, and I said, "It's gonna be ok, Pop, just you and me, we'll be fine."

I am going to miss her, but I am not going to miss the controlling, energy-sucking (she's a bit of a psychic vampire) thing she does.

So, I did a five-card draw on the situation: Queen of Pentacles (the Capricorn Queen shows up!), Justice, 9 of Cups, King of Pentacles, and 5 of Wands, reversed.

So basically, she's seeking balance and happiness, and taking decisive action. I feel like the 9 of Cups means that she will find this (whenever I see 9 of Cups in a reading, I say you'll get your wish.) 5 of Wands reversed--there will definitely be more arguing before this is over. But basically, I think things will be fine.

Some silly shit I posted at a Tarot group a few years ago

And with that opening (cut for me by the gracious founder), allow me to parry my sword through and introduce myself (Cyrano deBergerac-style bow.) I am Hermgirl,Queen of the Throne that lies between the Emerald Pillars. To translate my flowery parlance that means I am a worshipper at the "herm" of Dionysis (sp?),seeker of the knowlege that comes from experience. Jack of all trades, master of none. I am here to make new
buddies!

I have been doing Tarot off and on for about 10 years now, & I take a sort of casual approach to the cards. I am not as conversant as I see many of you are in the pagan arts & sciences (i.e.--knowledge of Arthurian legend, phases of the moon, crystals, etc.), but I do hope to learn & hopefully share what knowlege as I may have with others. I have more of a consciousness bent than a wiccanism bent--but that is only because I have so much more to learn.

My card having
been drawn today (Queen of Swords), I wanted to pose a question to the
members: Do you use music when you read & if so, do you ever just listen to the radio? What popular music (if any) do you find most conducive?
Yesterday I was reading W/the radio on, & found some very interesting correspondences. My card of the day was Death, whilst Sting's
"Brand New Day" was in the background. Interesting. Then I did a spread :The Hanged Man, the Sun, the World(R).

This I interpreted this as the sacrifices I have been making in balancing school& work,my struggle for enlightenment amid such a hectic sched, & alas it hasn't been going as well as I want it to lately. I pull another card--the Moon.

Aha! I take the World & turn it rightside up. I move the four cards around as the Santana/Everlast song "Put Your Lights On" comes on. The juxtapositions of the sacrifice & the great reward, & the light & the darkness make a trippy vibes & the music all comes together for me creating the Tarot "high" that I need, until I say blessed are those who have walked in darkness, for they have seen a great light!

I realize I am being extremely long-winded here, but I was just wondering if other members had those kind of experiences with their cards? I thank everyone for enduring my verbosity, and I do hope I can contribute as I am contributed towards.

Friday Night Tarot Hoedown!!!

YeeHaw! Pardners, saddle up for more Tarot goodness!

Today, the method of reading I will be using comes from the Complete Tarot Kit, which I got recently. It has a manual and journal written by Susan Levitt, and two miniature decks, a Rider Waite and a Thoth, which, while being very cute, are so small they are unshuffleable. I will have to learn the push/put method or something.

The book and journal that come with the kit, however, are indeed quite well done. She manages to interpret the Waite and Crowley decks, side by side, in a beginner sort of way without doing injustice to either.

Here is the reading I did tonight, using the method of interpretation set up in the journal.

The three card Body~Mind~Spirit spread.

Body: 7 of Pentacles
Mind: 8 of Wands
Spirit: The Magician
Major, minor, ace or court: the Magician
Suits represented: Pents, Wands
What is your intuitive sense about the cards? Planting seeds, watching them grow, thoughts traveling--ending in magickal power and skill.
Divinatory meanings from the book: Delayed sucess, swiftness, and magickal strength.
YOUR divinatory meanings: Physically, I have planted seeds for my goals to come to fruition. Mentally, my mind is in perpetual motion, the swift trajectory of my ideas. Spiritually, I have power to do great magick.
How do the cards apply? Well, I am watching Excalibur, so I feel kind of Merlinesque.---8:o)
What else do you see? The 7 of Pents is like, planting seeds, with growing wands, and the garden in the Magician card--it's like preparation, action, and completion.

Basically, the questions in bold are the things you should consider in their order to interpret a spread.

And tonight's five card draw: The Devil reversed, Ace of Wands, 9 of Pentacles, Death, 3 of Cups, reversed. Here, there is an offering of new beginnings and more wisdom. But I must allow old things to die and not fuck around, like by staying up all night.

Pearl Jam on Letterman

Ok, am I the only one that thinks that Pearl Jam are the most UN Rock & Roll band that ever was? I have held this opinion for quite some time, but tonight's offering was odiously symptomatic of the absolute contrivedness of this band.

Eddie Vedder just makes me sick, but what is up with Mike MaCready? His hair looks like he is TRYING to look like Woody Guthrie or Levon Helm. Grunge is OVER you guys, give it a rest, already. Am I saying that Woodie Guthrie or Levon Helm are uncool? No, they are legends. They also didn't have stylists that told them how to dress.

Enough about them. I think they should make Anna Gasteyer the permanent host of the Late Late Show. And I love Crosby and Nash.

Card of the Day: 5 of Pentacles, reversed. A new approach to old problems and time to start over and look at things in a new way. The people on this card are really starting from square one, if you think about it.

Dubya by Karen_Walker
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17 more LOW CARB alternatives

Watercress

Capers

Olives

Avocados

Brie cheese

Quail eggs

Mustard smoothie

¼ teaspoon of Ben & Jerry’s

Beef jerky on a bed of organic greens

Vanilla extract on the rocks

Wax lips

Maisy the Mouse

Folding chair

Tweezers

½ pound box of pasta (box itself)

Little House on the Prairie reruns

Will Ferrell

From: Brain Lint, by Amy Krouse Rosenthal –in Curves Magazine

And the Card of the Day is: 9 of Swords, reversed—I have got to stop staying up all night! Seriously.

So much for a card a day every SINGLE day...

So I pulled a card last night and it was Justice, reversed. And I said, "OK, why?" and pulled two more cards, which were 3 of Cups, reversed, and 6 of Swords. What I got out of that was that I was in for some discord due to my selfishness and superficiality, but that I would eventually overcome this. Sometimes the cards really kick my ass. They tell me what an undisciplined slob I am.

I've also decided to add a Friday night special deal (or, as in this case, early Saturday morning.) I will do a 5-card reading to review my week, whether I need it or not. I'll call it: Friday Night Tarot Hoedown! (RuPaul voice) And believe me, honey, I will put the Ho in Hoedown.

Cards of the Week: The Devil reversed, 10 of Cups, 2 of Swords, 7 of Pentacles, 10 of Swords.

What I get from this is that my intellect will win out over my superficiality, and the winning theme from earlier this week will come into play. I am finding balance, but I also have a choice: to remember not to halt the momentum of the good things I've been doing lately, or fall to ruin. There is nowhere to go but up.

Well, I have decided to go to Curves. In a couple months I am going to be buff like Linda Hamilton in Terminator 2, and my mom is paying for it. Yay!

I start tomorrow, and I feel like I am coming down with a cold--unyay, but I am going no matter how stuffy I get. I'll take some chewable echinacea tablets I got at Trader Joe's. Plus another thing I do for colds is I gargle with anticeptic mouthwash--it works better than cough drops for me. I know this is extremely good reading for all of you out there. Although, one of the things I notice is whenever I start something new like this or a job that I am excited about, I have a tendency to come down with a cold at the beginning.

And the card of the day is: Nine of Swords, reversed. Okay, so I'm kinda getting sick, but if I pushed through it, I will gain a lot more energy and health.

This just in: Cat Stevens, on the National Terrorist Watch List. Get on the Peace Train, people.

"He who makes a beast of himself, gets rid of the pain of being a man."

Dr. Johnson--Epigraph for the movie, "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas"

Well, tonight was a nice little party at one of my client's. Nothing to really write about, so I won't. I hardly know most of these people, but they seem to accept me readily. All very suburban.

And the card of the day (drawn as my Lord Satan, in the form of Benicio Del Toro, holds court on tv)is: Knight of Pentacles. My basic responsibleness makes a good impression on these people. Things are going well.

When I was walking Sunny in the park today this teenage girl came down to me from the bleachers--there is a group of teenage kids I call the 420 Crew, because I know they are smoking the Chronic all over the place. I started this whole "acting like the class clown" thing with them, because before they really shot a lot of hostility at me, and it diffused it very quickly. I just wanted to be able to walk near my house without getting dissed. So I started walking by, rubbing my nose like it was running and yelling, "Lucius, where's my heroin?" Now they love me...I don't know which is worse.

So this girl comes down from the bleachers, and she's obviously high. She walks around looking all goofy and says "Ohmygod, I am so high, I am freaking out!" I asked her what she took, how much, etc. I kind of like joking with the kids, but I feel really guilty about it.

I sort of don't even really want to interact with them, but one of the problems I have is that I look like I am still a teenager. Most 38 year old women would see that as a great thing, sometimes it is not so great. When you look like one of them, they think you are, and they wonder why you're not hanging out with them, or whatever.

Enough about that. After I walked Eli, I was shutting him into the gated area on the side of his house, and he sort of motioned to me as if to say "Come see what I got back here!" (yeah, dogs talk to me telepathically, didn't you know that?) I followed him to the back yard, and his owners have not only a very nice pool, but an adjoining hot tub/wading pool thingy, which Eli promptly jumped into. It was funny just watching this big Husky walk around in a wading pool.

And the card of the day is: Judgement--is it time to wake up and smell the coffee? I mean that in a good way, so maybe there is an opportunity for something that I need to open up to. Hmmm...

The other day I had a weird dream, nothing long and involved, just some old people walking around the periphery of my house. They were giggling and it was kind of scary and menacing in a weird way--but maybe that was because I rarely remember my dreams.

I have been feeling like a loser lately, but not today, because, it's official, I now have a fourth dog-walking client, a Siberian Husky by the name of Eli. So there's another sixty bucks a month in my pocket.

I walked him today and he is very well behaved--his owners had taken him to obedience training. The only thing that marred my dog-walking experience was the fact that there had been a fire somewhere near the place where I walk near the end of the day, which made it very hard to breathe.

And the Card of the Day is: 10 of Cups. It's all good!

So, What's Been Going on with Me, Then?

I haven't posted in a while because I was embarrassed.

That college philosophy class that I was so exited about fell through, due to my own failure to plan. I spent all day there, going for academic counseling, etc, only to have them tell me I didn't even need to do all of that re-matriculation stuff.

I was thinking how great it was that I would be taking a telecourse and I wouldn't have to go down to San Mateo all the time (San Mateo is sweltering most of the year.) I had stupidly assumed that since it was a telecourse I could just show up and register, no problem, right? Wrong.

The class had been full for five weeks. How does a distance learning class get full? I noticed there were only two or three of us that wanted to add, would it have been so hard to let us in? But enough whining.

It has also occurred to me, over the past couple of weeks, that while I have started this Tarot Blog Ring, I have precious little in the way of Tarot content on my own blog. I'm gonna attempt to remedy that right here and now. I am gonna start by posting a daily one-card reading--not so much a prediction, as a kind of snapshot of what's going on at the time.

This was a reading I did on the 23rd of last month, regarding school:

Knight of Swords/the Moon/the Emperor, reversed--the way I interpreted this was: going off half-cocked, self deception, ill dignified authority, no fathering, rootlessness, baselessness.
What I told myself was this: Get with the program, girl, any program!
The Emperor reversed/Father connection was fleshed out a few days later, when I was talking to my parents about going to college and he went "You're going back to SCHOOL?" I said yeah and he made a little harumphing noise. He's real supportive that way.
Basically the cards were telling me I was fooling myself if I thought I was gonna be successful without planning ahead. Sometimes the cards kick my ass.
Anywho, starting tomorrow I may have a new dog-walking client. I have a trial run with a Samoyed that lives across the street from the little schnauzer.
And our daily one-card reading says: Page of Swords, reversed. Well I just suck, that's all.

Friday night musings (on Saturday morning)

Some interesting coincidences have been happening the past few days.

First I was out walking the dog, and I started thinking about my friend (former lj friend) , for no reason (and he hasn't posted in ages) and I decided that when I got home from the walk I would check my friends page and I would see a post by him and what do you know...

Then I was walking the dog on a day when I had decided to go to Michael's afterward and get some yarn, and what did I see while I was out walking the dog? A woman knitting. People don't knit in public a lot where I live. I went up and talked to her about it. Then later when I was at Michael's I was looking in the yarn section and I met someone who is on LJ in the crochet community.

Just some interesting synchronicity.

"Of course, when the sunrise comes, people don't usually shoot back at it."--Lewis Black

This was an interesting read.

Now, I have no intention of hating on Muslims or being racist against Middle Eastern people whatsoever, but there is this from the Book of the Law, from the chapter on the god of War and of Vengeance:

"I am in a secret fourfold word, the blasphemy against all gods of men.
Curse them! Curse them! Curse them!
With my Hawk's head I peck at the eyes of Jesus as he hangs upon the cross.
I flap my wings in the face of Mohammed and blind him.
With my claws I tear out the flesh of the Indian and the Buddhist, Mongol and Din.
Bahlasti! Ompedha! I spit on your crapulous creeds!"

BOTL, 3:49-54

What really got me thinking was this bit from the article (and here is where I'm gonna start talking about how it's the little things that fuck you up, not the big glaring things.):

"Secularists are Muslims who do not have a knowledge of the contents of the Koran and only know a verse or two to justify enjoying their life such as 'Wealth and children are the adornment of the life of this world.' These should be cursed right along with the others."

This rang a bell with me because my family (who wouldn't be caught dead in church) is very proud of telling people they live by the "Golden Rule" and that's good enough for them.

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." Now, my parents are the kind of people who treat everyone as fairly and as kindly as they know how in their day to day lives, and are often disappointed by the fact that others don't often do the same. It seems as though they save all their rage for each other (and sometimes me, but that's a whole nother issue.)

Anywho, the Golden Rule is from Matthew 7, which (like most of the bible) is promise-based injunctions, sort of "don't do this, or this will happen, do this, and this will happen."

What I wonder is, does living according to a promise-based platitude from a crapulous creed actually place someone under a curse? I don't necessarily mean a "curse" as in someone putting a hex on you, but is there a spiritual imprint that is left?

Getting back to the Muslims, the ideas in this article would explain the recent things I've been hearing about how the militant Muslims have been occupying mosques and stocking them with guns...

Just something to think about. In no way is this meant to encourage anyone to stop hating Bush by the way...

Nuthin' Matters & What If It Did?

Nihilist Bear

Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?
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I got this one before. The word "nihil" means "nothing".

"For I am perfect, being Not..." Liber Al, 2:15

Fook yeah!

You are a True Metalhead. You dig the
classic music and the classic lifestyle. As
metalheads go, you're pretty open-minded in
terms of music and lyrics; if it rocks, then
you'll listen to it. Concerts are the pinnacle
of the metal experience, though sometimes they
get a little too crazy. You generally respect
everybody else, but as far as you're concerned,
they all wish they were Priest or Maiden.


What Kind of Metalhead Are You?
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Up the Irons!!! \m/

"Now ye shall know that the chosen priest and apostle of infinite space is the prince-priest, the Beast; and in his woman called the Scarlet Woman is all power given. They shall bring the glory of the stars into the hearts of men."

Aleister Crowley--The Book of the Law, 1:15

I just found out that the twelfth was the Feast of the Beast and His Bride. Happy belated Feast Day, here's wishing you blessings that bring the glory of the stars into your hearts.

You are the the Hierophant card. The Hierophant,
called The Pope in some decks, is the preserver
of cultural traditions. After entering The
Emperor's society, The Hierophant teaches us
its wisdom. The Hierophant learns and teaches
our cultural traditions. The discoveries our
ancestors have made influence the present.
Without forces such as The Hierophant who are
able to interpret and communicate traditional
lore, each generation would have to begin to
learn anew. As a force that is concentrated on
our past and our culture, The Hierophant can
sometimes be stubborn and set in his ways. This
is a negative trait he shares with his zodiac
sign, Taurus. But like Taurus he is productive.
His traditional lore can provide a source of
inspiration for the creatively inclined, and
his knowledge provides an excellent foundation
for those who come into their own in the
business world. Image from: Morgan E.
Cauthers-Knox.
http://elfwood.lysator.liu.se/loth/m/o/morganc/morganc.html


Which Tarot Card Are You?
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Interesting. I've gotten this as a life card according to some book somewhere. I have a very strong Inner Teacher (of course, I don't always listen to it, shame on me!) which also means I have a love of learning at the same time.

Digging Up Ghosts

"All writing of the narrative kind, and perhaps all writing, is motivated, deep down, by a fear of and a fascination with mortality--by a desire to make the risky trip to the Underworld and to bring something or someone back from the dead."

Margaret Atwood--Negotiating With the Dead: A Writer on Writing

So last night I'm sitting in Wendy's having dinner, reading an interview with Margaret Atwood in Writer's Digest. All of a sudden it occurs to me, this Wendy's is situated on the spot where once was an A & W. The very same A & W where, over 20 years ago, I used to sit and hang out with a friend who once told me she might be related to Margaret Atwood. A friendship long dead.

I started having an imaginary conversation with the friend's "ghost":

"I wonder what it's like being a published author. You know, that would be the pinnacle of success for me--to be a published author and have my book made into a movie like Margaret Atwood or Stephen King."

"What would you write about?"

"I'd write about us. About growing up during the 70s and 80s, hanging out in coffee shops and fast food places. It would be like an 80s version of 'Grease'."

"Somebody already made that movie--"Fast Times at Ridgemont High'."

"Yeah, but the trouble with 'Ridgmont' is it was done pretty much as it was happening. The beauty of movies like 'Grease' and 'American Grafitti' is that they are filtered through the perspective of 20 - 30 years later--they had nostalgia going for them."

Then I started thinking, what with the internet and the 80s being trotted out as a fad every two years, do we have the ability to be nostalgic about things in that way any more?